Miles From Fenway

NYC Response 1 – The Rower
January 1, 2005, 4:56 pm
Filed under: the experiment

From: The Rower
Date: Jun 17, 2005 2:36 PM
Subject: $100 – $100 — A Great Deal For The Right Guy

I’m responding to your ad on craigslist. I am 24 (5-11, 180 lbs),
just out of college, work in the accounting profession.

Have a very ripped body, was a varsity rower in college (UNC Chapel Hill).

I cook (and bake) and am very clean. I work weekdays and go to the gym either after or before work every day.

Picture is attached. Would love to hear from you.

“The Rower”

It should be noted here that he sent three pictures of himself. For a minute I got excited at how hot this guy was. Then I realized I was never going to meet him. Damn.

I replied to his email a few days later, explaining the experiment and asking if he would mind participating. I received this response:

From: “The Rower”
To: finy apartment
Date: Jun 22, 2005 10:07 AM
Subject: Re: $100 – $100 — A Great Deal For The Right Guy

What a great idea! Of course I’m not upset. I found a great 2-bedroom in Park Slope with a buddy of mine. We’re moving there August 1.

However, here’s the catch about me: I’m gay. So, my answers might not be useful in regards to being a man sexualized by women.

But whatever I can do to help your study, let me know. I think that the whole man to woman, woman to man sexualization boils down to submissive vs dominant. You can see it a lot in the gay community with “tops” and “bottoms” (sorry, do not know the clinical terms for these).

All the best,
“The Rower”

Damn! Now not only was I sad that I would never get to meet him, now I couldn’t even FANTASIZE about him anymore! I emailed him back, telling him I would still love for him to participate. We talked a few times over email before I finally got my questions together, and it’s possible I’ve made a new gay boyfriend out of the deal!

Finally I sent him my questions, and here are his responses:

From: “The Rower”
To: finy apartment
Date: Jun 24, 2005 10:09 AM
Subject: Re: $100 – $100 — A Great Deal For The Right Guy

Please see the answers below.
“The Rower”

On 6/23/05, finy apartment wrote:
> Name: “The Rower”>
> Where do you currently live (neighborhood is fine): Harlem
> How old are you? 24
> What do you do for a living? Tax Accountant – International Executive Services
> Do you live with roommates, parents, or on your own? Alone
> What about this arrangement appealed to you? Cheap rent, desire for something unorthodox
> Can you actually cook and clean? Absolutely. My apartment is very clean, and I can make a mean Hollandaise
> Did you intentionally withhold the fact that you were gay? Absolutely
Would you have told your potential roommate before moving in? Not sure, most likely
> Did you make any assumptions about the poster’s identity? No. I figured I’d meet the person if she was interested so there was no point to think about it. Although I did think that being gay might affect her desire to have me around. In which case I thought it might be worth concealing it since she didn’t want to sleep with me anyhow.
> If you had moved into the apartment do you think you would have told
> your friends/family about the arrangement? Absolutely, both friends and family
> Any other comments?
> Ok, I think that’s all for now. Congrats again on finding the new place! Thank you kindly.

I think it ads an interesting twist on the experiment that The Rower was gay. I’ve sent him a follow up asking if it had been a gay man posting the ad if it would have made a difference to him.


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